Jump to content
Orca Cola Championship
C2MC

The Bachelogrette: Episode 6

Recommended Posts

Posted (edited)

32X7Gl0.png?1

 

After a long and arduous journey back to the fancy mansion, the contestants are welcomed back to the luxurious palace and the luscious garden surrounding it. The relaxing scenery and soothing music is appreciated even more so after spending a whole week trying to keep a tiny, baby Ogre entertained. The double elimination last week has brought us down to only 6 remaining bachelors, all gathered around the podium once more... awaiting the arrival of Lennifer and the Handsome Coach. Sloppy footsteps and childish banter can be heard in the distance and as the sound draws closer and closer, Lennifer walks on to the stage, holding hands with the tiny, baby Ogre.

 

"Go on now, you tells 'em" Lennifer mutters as she gives the tiny, baby Ogre a little nudge forward. The little grunt takes another step and finds himself facing all of the contestants he got to know over the course of the week. He waves his little hand around a bit and grabs a slab of leather from the back of his trunks. As he unfolds it, the contestants can see that tiny, baby Ogre has prepared some sort of speech.

 

Tiny, baby Ogre clears his tiny, baby throat with an adorable gurgle and speaks;

 

"I thank you all, for all your time,

the places that you brought me to.

And so I wrote a little rhyme,

a tiny, baby ode to all of you."

 

Tiny, baby Ogre suddenly stops, looking quite distracted. "Who's that?" he asks as he points his chubby finger at Hench-Gobbo #3. "Dat Gobbo, he bachelor." Lennifer eloquently replies. "But he didn't take me nowhere. I've never seen the likes of him, not here nor there." "WAT?" Lennifer shouts "But that was deal, he take you out, you 'ave fun and tell me who make nice the best!". Tiny, baby Ogre replies "I wish I could tell you what he's all about, but I cannot do that, he did not take me out. I've never seen that Goblin before. A stranger he is, of that I am sure."

 

Lennifer's giant hand reaches for the table that's carrying the ceremonial rock,... but she hesitates. She pulls her throwing arm back and quickly steps forward, right up to Hench-Gobbo #3. As she bends down and stares the small creature right in his eyes, she softly says; "You make nice for weeks, and now you not bother? You not earn rock to head... you make me feel... dispropointman." Hench-Gobbo #3 turns around and starts walking away, ashamed that he forced an Ogre to try and use a big word to describe her feelings.

 

Lennifer turns around and walks back on stage. "Now that over with. TIME FOR GUD PART! This week is swim suit competishun!" Lennifer screams in an ecstatic tone as the thought of seeing all of her bachelors semi-nude fills her head and completely erases any memory of the disappointment she felt several seconds before. "We go to Bretons beach, play some volley-Gnob and 'ave fun in the sun! Haha!". Lennifer claps her hands, like a small child excited to go on a trip and then abruptly realises that there's still an actual child standing on the podium next to her. "Come little one, time for bed" she says as she grabs tiny, baby Ogre by the arm and escorts him off the stage. Before they reach the big house, Lennifer softly asks tiny, baby Ogre who his favourite babysitter was.

 

"Nes was fun, for an Elf anyway.

He put me on the pitch and he let me play.

 

Hans was very stoic, a proud Beastman,

he showed me to Pile On as hard as I can!

 

Dogbert's a bit older and grizzly indeed,

but he made me a saddle and then turned Boof in to a steed.

 

Lenny's like me, he much likes to rhyme.

He will find his mojo, all in good time.

 

Mr.Turner may be squishy and no alpha-male,

but he's very clever and got me a Prehensile Tail.

 

But who was the best, is for you to decide.

After all, it is you who will be the winner's bride... ."

 

Having understood only half of those fancy words, Lennifer giggles at the tiny, baby Ogre's odd way of speaking. "Fancy fella..." she mutters under her breath. As the door closes behind them and the screen fades to black... .

 

Contestants! It is time for the mandatory swimsuit edition of The Bachelogrette. Grab your shiniest trunks and sunscreen and get ready to find sand in every crack, because we're taking you to to the Brionne Beaches... because the hotels are cheaper there! @brocCooLi, @Fantus, @Waleed, @Sliceanddice, @Suido, better start packing!

 

@Borke, even though Hench-Gobbo #3 was forced to walk away with great shame, you are still allowed a few parting words. Not too many though.

Edited by C2MC

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

"Tiny Baby Ogre", Hench-Gobbo #3 mumbles, "I'm sorry I let you down. You're a really awesome Tiny, Baby Ogre, and I wish you all the best."

 

1 hour ago, C2MC said:

Not too many though.

 

Hench-Gobbo #3 starts to speak more, then stops, and walks away.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

2 hours ago, C2MC said:

... because the hotels are cheaper there!

 

"Oh yes indeed. Very nice cheap price for hotels. I actually bought all four hotels at Brionne Beaches since it was so cheap. So now we all can have an all inclusive experience." Nes says with a smile after having spent some money buying hotels.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Lennifer can volley my gnob, anytime.

 

See you on the sand.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

8 hours ago, brocCooLi said:

 

"Oh yes indeed. Very nice cheap price for hotels. I actually bought all four hotels at Brionne Beaches since it was so cheap. So now we all can have an all inclusive experience." Nes says with a smile after having spent some money buying hotels.

"I should keep this key. Couse of this competition i have became weaker and.... Bleeeh nicer" - Mr Turner whispered to himsef so silently that nobody could hear that.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Awards

Posted (edited)

Dogbert wasn't sure him and swimsuits would mix well! So foolishly, he decided to ask a fellow contestant for advice. Of course, not sure who he could trust, he approach Nes, surely a high elf would know what women want and how to dress? He always looked like he knew what women wanted!

 

Nes was only too pleased to give some advice, with a sly smile as he did. "You see Dogbert, these days women like pretty boys. They want men who moisturise and get every inch of their bodies waxed! Get yourself to my local spa, I will even arrange your treatment!! Then all you need to do is stand on the beach and flex your muscles!"

 

Dogbert was very grateful, and soon found himself outside the 4 story, 7 acre luxury spa. And True to his word, Nes had arranged it all. It is fair to say Dogbert did struggle with the whole experience. He had rolled around in mud before and had people trample on him, but he had never paid good money in order to do so!! This must be how the other half live, money seems to make people do silly things.

 

But then came the waxing. The spa brought in a team of 8 to try and manage it, and three vats of hot wax.

 

OOOOOWWWWWWWW!!!!!!

 

GGGGRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!

 

FFFFFFFFFKKKKKKK!!!!!

 

Never had he felt pain like it! He almost felt sorry for the three technicians he had knocked out before they decided to chain him down while they finished. Every hair below the neckline was gone. EVERY. HAIR. His nipples stung and he did not dare sit down!

 

But its crazy what a minotaur will do for the love of a good woman!

 

Nes had even gone to the trouble of leaving him some suitably multi-coloured swimming pants. They did not leave a great deal to the imagination! 

 

So Dogbert walked down to the beach, in his too small pants and hairless flesh and flexed as hard as he could!! 

 

Fingers crossed Lennifer would like what she saw!

 

d7mdfx-1d47a873-7838-4dba-a3ce-67514e352acd.jpg

 

 

Edited by Fantus

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

15 hours ago, Fantus said:

Fingers crossed Lennifer would like what she saw!

 

Lennifer is currently beating up forum administrators because we cannot upvote this post more than once.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

The SBS, Special Boat Service,

 

To Lennifer,
I am clearing out the area of any undesirables and then we will go for a romantic swim together, dressed more appropriately, and For Your Eyes Only.
...with love,
Hans.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Awards

Posted (edited)

Mr Turner enters the beach wearing... plated armor. He is stomping steadily and full of strenght. 

- Mr Turner -Handsome coach starts talking pretty confused - as you are aware this is a swiming suits contest.

Mr Turner looks at him and starts laughing. In his eyes there is no fear. Only madness and bloodlust

- This is my swiming suit - He roars with a deep voice... how it is even possible? - I swim only in blood of my enemies.

Probably adventure with baby ogre or long-term warpstone exposure made Mr Turner pretty insane. Hovewer love is insanity, so maybe he now has better odds. Who knows? Probably only Lennifer and Handsome Coach. 

latest?cb=20120220211231

Edited by Sliceanddice

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Awards

After buying all the hotels at Brionne Beaches Nes spent some more money to buy in some chomp-ain, some kind of alcoholic beverage with bubbles. Hopefully that would help to make them relax and have a good time at the beach.

 

Before going down to the beach Nes took a relaxing shower. Afterwards he moisturized his body with some essential oils. Leaving a small shine on his skin.

After that Nes brushed his hair and made some braids. He shaved and put some perfume on. After that, he put sun lotion on his body to avoid getting too much of a tan.

Lastly, he put on his new yellow speedos. Finally he was ready for some party on the beach with Lennifer and the rest.

 

Nes walked down to the beach and immediately saw Dogbert and walked over.

"Damn Dogbert! Looking sharp!" Nes smiles at the minotaur and gives him a high five.

 

Nes looks over and sees Mr Turner in his plate armor.

"Oh... Please remind me Mr Turner never to take a swim with you. Im not sure that I would enjoy it. But you can also remind me to let you know of some places where you can take a swim." Nes smiles politle.

 

In the distance Nes could see Hans play that he was some kind of soldier.

"Oh well, let him have his fun before it gets serious." he said to Dogbert and Mr Turner.

 

"What about some chomp-ain while we wait for the rest?" Nes said and opened up the first bottle with a impressive pop from the bottle as the cork shot away through the air.

 

 

38HHUkm.jpg

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Oh hey y'all. I faked getting knocked out early in my match then switched a dummy into my place for the rest of the game. Big shout out to the boys for winning against the previously undefeated team without me. Anyway, I just rowed my boat into shore and I brought my dog, Moose. I would appreciate it if no one ate him. 

 

Image result for lenny kravitz beach

 

So I brought my fishing gear as well, but the only thing I really want to catch is Lennifer's eye. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

On 3/8/2019 at 8:34 AM, Fantus said:

So Dogbert walked down to the beach, in his too small pants and hairless flesh and flexed as hard as he could!! 

 

I have now seen the intersection between furry and neck-down alopecia fetishes. Amazing.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Posted (edited)
8 hours ago, brocCooLi said:

Nes looks over and sees Mr Turner in his plate armor.

"Oh... Please remind me Mr Turner never to take a swim with you. Im not sure that I would enjoy it. But you can also remind me to let you know of some places where you can take a swim." Nes smiles politle.

Mr Turner removes his helmet and whispers to the Nes'es ear 

- Psst, this is just a trick - he starts very silently and squeaky - Last week I took acting classes but I have mistaken the room number and instead attending "play dead classes" i was participating in "play deadly classes". But, to be honest, maybe it was better.

Mr Turner winks to Nes and again puts expression of anger, instanity and bloodlust on his face. 

Edited by Sliceanddice

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Awards


  • Support the OCC

    Donate Sidebar by DevFuse
×
×
  • Create New...